HA!

"What's the issue dear?  Why are you holding back from such a man?"

Is it the quickstep way he walks?
Or the acrid way he talks?
Or the scary, hairy weirdness of his feet?
And though we know he's meaning well, he
Always ends up talking cruelly
But you'll never meet a fella who's as fun, loyal, and neat

So he's a bit of a fixer upper
So he's got a few quirks
His peculiar brain, girl, his weird lack of anger
Though he stills comes off a jerk

So he's a bit of a fixer upper, but this we're certain of
You can fix this fixer upper with a little bit of love

Is it the way his arm's impaired?
Or that he walks around bare?
Or that he can't sit still throughout a show?
Are you holding back your fondness
Due to his tailor-hated brawnness?
Or the way he covers up you set his face aglow?

He's just a bit of a fixer upper
He's got a few bugs
His isolation is confirmation
Of his desperation for healing hugs

So he's a big of a fixer upper
But we know what to do
The way to fix this fixer upper
Is to fix him up with you

"Enough!  She's still in high school!"

So she's a bit of a grower upper
That's a minor dent
This quote age problem isn't so solemn
And she's still in the age of consent

So she's a bit of a grower upper
Her age's a bit betwixt
Get her to bend on the weekend
And the whole thing will be fixed!