I should be writing poetry here, I know, cause I said I'd do NaPoWriMo, but you know what? I still don't get poetry. To me, it feels like poetry is trying to shove meaning into words by making them vague or self-important. I want to get it. I like some poems, but even the ones I like, I recognize they are good poems because they are vague or self-important. They understand giant ideas or overstate simple ones. I get that it's art, but I see inequality. Anyway...
Adderall's kicking in now.
Boy's down for a nap. Ran around with a blankie on his neck swinging a golf club. New superhero? Upper Class White Man?
That's actually not a bad name and the jokes write themselves, don't they? The hero could even be doing it ironically or to hide his true identity.
I've got Pandora seeded with Gorillaz and Crime and Punishment. I think it's the first Russian book I've read. I remember my father making me read it when I was a kid, but I didn't get very far. I showed him a typo in it and he got mad. "You WOULD find the ONE typo in a SEVEN HUNDRED page book!" he bellowed, snatching the book away from me in his library.
Looking back at the incident, it probably wasn't a typo. I mean, C&P has been reprinted how many times in how many languages? It's pretty typo-checked at this point. It was probably a spelling of a word neither of us were aware of. Like wyrd and weird.
I've gotten two unusual compliments lately. I want to share them without context.
"You should write porn."
"You're the only cis gendered person I know who gets it."
I love unusual compliments. My favorite compliment of all time is "He's devilishly handsome." Just tickles me pink. That was in high school, where I also got my favorite gift of all time (gift-gift, not touchy-feely life-gift like hope, my son, my wife, etc).
My parents (mom and husband no. 2) bought me a full-page, full-color ad in the year book with tons of pictures of me (ME!) and a loving message. At the point they gave it to me, it was only a GREAT present. It became my favorite present of all time the following year when my brother graduated and they only gave him a 1/8th page black-and-white dedication. Day-mn.
Nothing like actual confirmation that you are the favorite son.
Actually, now that I say that, there's one other son that got shafted and lived in my shadow. Husband no. 2 had a biological son. With the whole family together in the room as husband no. 2 was on his death bed, he looks to me and says "You are my favorite son." Day-mn.
THOR
We were raised together, we played together, we fought together. Do you remember none of that?
LOKI
I remember a shadow. Living in the shade of your greatness.
Can't blame neither of them for not caring for me too much. Maybe one day they'll heal and be able to look at me as just another person.
Turning to the near future, I have only one goal on my New Years Resolutions list scheduled for this week. I'm going to read to Hunter every day.
I'm continuing to shape my personal philosophies down to bite size chunks that can guide me to be better.
In a few hours, Grandma will pick up Hunter for an overnight party. Shortly after that, I'm meeting Kiri to bring her cupcakes for her presentation at school tonight. The Central Florida Tropical Fruit Club meets tonight and I'm going to make this time! I'll grab a small dinner at home or abroad, whatever. Do More. Eat Less.
I told Straight Rob that I'd finish the script for our sequel to Jaws by the end of the month, so I should work on it. I told Jaron that I'd write the script for an Anne Frank comedy when he did the research I asked so I've got time there. I'm all caught up on magazine articles, but I could hustle some more work (spoiler: I won't). I can't edit my novel because Kiri has it. I want to put it in a binder and I don't have a three hole punch, so she's penetrating my work at her work. Twisty sentence on purpose.
Got four movies to watch: Kissed, Grudge Match, Sunshine, and Black Dynamite
Kissed (necrophiliac love story)
Grudge Match (old Rocky vs old Raging Bull)
Sunshine (sci-fi mission to restart sun)
Black Dynamite (looks hilarious! Like Kung Pao: Enter the Fist meets blaxploitation)
The adderall's mellowed now. I can stop typing if I choose to.
Have A Nice Day!
Jelly Belly
Dear Jelly Belly,
It's like that girl that you can't stop thinking about and it just goes on for years torturing you. You know it's never going to happen. You know the answer is no, but as long as you don't ask the question, it isn't DEFINITELY no. So, for years, I haven't asked if the candy cane flavor from the Christmas assortment from years ago was ever returning. Because I already know the answer, but as long as I don't ask the question, it isn't certain. I need to move on with my life and find another favorite jellybean though. I can't keep living in the past. So I'll ask, so you can say no, and it will hurt, but I'll move on. Is the candy cane flavor jellybean ever returning?
Ready To Move On,
Adam
Dear Adam,
Oh happy day...your longing and torturous wait will soon be ending! Drum roll, please…We are bringing back Candy Cane for Christmas, along with some of our other retired holiday favorites. Check back with us in the fall and we will know if it is available before Thanksgiving.
Aren't you glad you didn't give up on us? “All good things come to those who wait” (sometimes, anyway).
Now you can move out of the past and look to a sweet future…“Is the candy cane flavor jellybean ever returning?” YES, YES, YES!
Sweet Regards,
Kit McCoy
Consumer Affairs Manager
It's like that girl that you can't stop thinking about and it just goes on for years torturing you. You know it's never going to happen. You know the answer is no, but as long as you don't ask the question, it isn't DEFINITELY no. So, for years, I haven't asked if the candy cane flavor from the Christmas assortment from years ago was ever returning. Because I already know the answer, but as long as I don't ask the question, it isn't certain. I need to move on with my life and find another favorite jellybean though. I can't keep living in the past. So I'll ask, so you can say no, and it will hurt, but I'll move on. Is the candy cane flavor jellybean ever returning?
Ready To Move On,
Adam
Dear Adam,
Oh happy day...your longing and torturous wait will soon be ending! Drum roll, please…We are bringing back Candy Cane for Christmas, along with some of our other retired holiday favorites. Check back with us in the fall and we will know if it is available before Thanksgiving.
Aren't you glad you didn't give up on us? “All good things come to those who wait” (sometimes, anyway).
Now you can move out of the past and look to a sweet future…“Is the candy cane flavor jellybean ever returning?” YES, YES, YES!
Sweet Regards,
Kit McCoy
Consumer Affairs Manager
Poem 6
Suscito - v. latin [sus (pig) + cito (I cause to move, excite; I summon)]
I encourage, stir up, and awaken
A man chooses; a slave obeys
I fuel, I evoke, I provoke and
I aim to misbehave
I encourage, stir up, and awaken
A man chooses; a slave obeys
I fuel, I evoke, I provoke and
I aim to misbehave
Poem 5
Advice to the Son
Cause.
Exercise.
Don't wait.
Don't smoke.
Wear a condom.
Wear your seatbelt.
Eat less and do more.
Measure twice. Cut once.
Have fun. Be good. Don't die.
Eat what you want, only what you want.
Know a doctor, a lawyer, a dentist, and a contractor.
Happiness equals your wants divided by your satisfaction.
Live your life so amazingly that people don't believe your stories.
Poem 4
Alien skulls and top hats, tin toys and statues of Hamlet,
That's pretty much it.
I don't collect shit.
Two polos. Two a-shirts. A t-shirt from Rome.
A handful of things that just make this home.
Black briefcase of drugs, pills... good stuff.
A few things for me are more than enough.
That's pretty much it.
I don't collect shit.
Two polos. Two a-shirts. A t-shirt from Rome.
A handful of things that just make this home.
Black briefcase of drugs, pills... good stuff.
A few things for me are more than enough.
Captain Jack Sparrow vs Captain James Hook
I put this matchup to my friends and the decision was very one sided.
Scenario 1:
Captain Sparrow draws his sword. Captain Hook draws his gun and shoots Sparrow dead.
Scenario 2:
Captain Sparrow is immortal. Captain Hook keeps stabbing him, gets frustrated and puts him in the Boo Box, leaving him to be stung by scorpions forever.
Scenario 3:
The Black Pearl is manned by a rag tag crew of comic relief. The Jolly Roger is manned by a rag tag crew of former Lost Boys who now spend all day slitting the throats of child guerrillas and a magic flying elf, showing both cruelty and proficiency. The Pearl is sunk.
Scenario 4:
The Jolly Roger is the same. The Black Pearl is manned by the fearsome zombie crew.
"Heh. We're going to need a lot of Boo Boxes." - Hook
The zombie crew is the only way the Pearl has a chance, but remember that's twenty zombies versus (from the movie Hook) a CITY of cutthroats.
Scenario 1:
Captain Sparrow draws his sword. Captain Hook draws his gun and shoots Sparrow dead.
Scenario 2:
Captain Sparrow is immortal. Captain Hook keeps stabbing him, gets frustrated and puts him in the Boo Box, leaving him to be stung by scorpions forever.
Scenario 3:
The Black Pearl is manned by a rag tag crew of comic relief. The Jolly Roger is manned by a rag tag crew of former Lost Boys who now spend all day slitting the throats of child guerrillas and a magic flying elf, showing both cruelty and proficiency. The Pearl is sunk.
Scenario 4:
The Jolly Roger is the same. The Black Pearl is manned by the fearsome zombie crew.
"Heh. We're going to need a lot of Boo Boxes." - Hook
The zombie crew is the only way the Pearl has a chance, but remember that's twenty zombies versus (from the movie Hook) a CITY of cutthroats.
Poem 3
And if you don't eat, don't smoke, and you suffer
If you drive slow, go running, and sit still
If you only get mad just the right amount at each other
If you stim'late your mind and you focus your will
If you keep your family together, love your mom and your brother
If you put some away and promptly pay every bill
If you never get hurt and do these things til you're sore
You can continue along, but you'll just be a bore
Who wakes early to rise and goes early to bed
You'll live a bit longer, but wish you were dead
If you drive slow, go running, and sit still
If you only get mad just the right amount at each other
If you stim'late your mind and you focus your will
If you keep your family together, love your mom and your brother
If you put some away and promptly pay every bill
If you never get hurt and do these things til you're sore
You can continue along, but you'll just be a bore
Who wakes early to rise and goes early to bed
You'll live a bit longer, but wish you were dead
Poem 2
An onward progression of progressive regression
Whatever once ventured ungained
The snapback to the real from the gains of ideal
With intentions left storied and stained
About how when two sides are extreme, the middle is inevitable. Even when one side pulls ahead, it's pulled back towards the middle eventually. The only way to move the middle is to move the other extreme towards their opponent and that happens much slower than the winning side would like. Corn ethanol, for instance. Or censorship.
Whatever once ventured ungained
The snapback to the real from the gains of ideal
With intentions left storied and stained
About how when two sides are extreme, the middle is inevitable. Even when one side pulls ahead, it's pulled back towards the middle eventually. The only way to move the middle is to move the other extreme towards their opponent and that happens much slower than the winning side would like. Corn ethanol, for instance. Or censorship.
NaPoWriMo 30 Days. 30 Poems. Go.
Take apart. Rebuild.
Take toll. Reattach.
Subtraction. Reaction. A secondary motion to make whole.
Damage and Restore.
Does the renew match
The new as it was Before?
Examination. Consternation. Certainty. Tab A in Slot A.
Something is missing but the parts are okay.
An unmeasured irreplaceable component fled
And now what was is dead.
About how something can work on paper and make sense on paper but without a common sense point of view of the big picture, it will never work no matter what you do. Like undissecting a frog or socialism or advocating a selfish morality.
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