Book Blogger Challenge 1/15

Make 15 book-related confessions

1.  I abandon books I'm not enjoying, then read the plot synopsis on Wikipedia.  When I have conversations about the book, I don't tell the other person if this is what I did and speak as if I finished the book.

2.  I don't like several must-love classics like To Kill A Mockingbird and Catcher in the Rye.

3.  My favorite books happen to be short like Dr. Jekyll and slaughtermatic

4.  I am not open to the idea that modern fiction is as good as classic fiction.

5.  I don't like Dr Seuss.  I do not like him, Sam-I-Am.

6.  I can't tell one fantasy and/or science fiction book from another.  They'll all the same auto-ego-masturbation to me.

7.  I throw out books.  That is tantamount to evil for some people, but I see nothing wrong with it.

8.  I download my comics.  My rate of purchase to download is around 1:25.

9.  When people ask me for honest feedback, I do not give it.  I stay positive.

10.  I think full bookshelves are a sign of someone with an insecurity of their intelligence.

11.  I don't think there's a reason to own more than one bookshelf cabinet.

12.  I think everyone should write a book, even if they can't write well.

13.  I buy books at Goodwill, sign them as the author, then re-donate them.

14.  When I write a book, I'll bury and sly insult in it about someone I know.  Then I know if they actually read the book.

15.  I hate e-readers SO FAR.  I will abandon books when I find one I like.

State of the Estate

Been dieting for three months now and my weekly grocery lists have settled into a pattern.


To eat:
Frozen cooked diced boneless skinless grilled chicken breast
Tuna pouches (no more than 3/week)
Salmon filet
10 calorie sugar free Jello cups

To drink:
(2) 1.5 liter bottles of water (which I just refill for a week, then toss)
Coffee grounds
Quart of skim milk (for coffee)
Protein powder
Meal replacement shakes

270 to 220 in 90 days.  Eat between 600 and 1200 calories a day.  P90X workouts each day.



Enough of that talk.  November looms.  Novel Writing November.  But first, I'm going to do a character creating challenge in October.  A new character every day in October.  And this is where I'll post them.  Probably.  There's a site dedicated to this so it might have me post them there, but I might not bother with it.

Got to use the word 'looms' so it was a good day.

2013 and 2014 Resolutions

2013 Resolutions

22. Take five interesting self-pictures (FAILED, took 3)

44. Get to reddit front page with a photo (Hunter's first hair cut to r/parenting)

21. Use sunscreen every day (FAILED, 2 days only)

37. Join the Masons/Lodge (Joined Eagles)

45. Go to driving range (125 yards)

41. Graffiti (Transmet smiley and “I hate it here” on DMV bathroom wall)

14. Try Ethiopian food (Nile Ethiopian)

32. Moisturize (didn't see a difference)

27. Read two books (FAILED, distracted with Phil's wedding)

29. Eat dark chocolate (still don't like dark chocolate)

11. Make a new enemy (flame war with Jessica Suarez, friend of a friend, over religion)

18. Work out my left shoulder every day (not bad)

40. Write two songs (Sinsational and “Did You Think That Was It?” )

23. Stretch every morning (quit after 1 day. Not a good idea with my shoulder)

47. Write a letter to a politician (to Marco Rubio to end the Cuban embargo)

38. Own a print of "Son of Man" (owned)

34. Shave every day (FAILED 6/7)

2. Take Hunter to Gymboree every day I have him (FAILED, Kiri stayed home and took him once)

25. Take a class (FAILED)

20. Connect with my neighbors (emailing connection)

46. Make fire without matches (FAILED, done)

26. Read to Hunter every day (FAILED on 3^rd day)

39. Go fishing (FAILED)

15. Eat raw (quit, seemed worse once I looked it up)

28. Drink red wine everyday (yum)

43. Meet someone named Adam Simon (musician from Illinois)

49. Shooting range with target picture (FAILED)

9. Replace the overhang vents (done)

19. Go on a solo overnight vacation (changed to day-cation, I like my bed)

13. Eat fruits and veggies twice a day (mostly apples)

3. Live off of $20 (FAILED)

31. Get a massage (Whole Foods)

17. Iron the curtains (humidity did it)

48. Go to dog track/horse races (Sanford-Orlando Kennel Club)

12. Take a singing lesson (Done)

16. Try a restaurant that I normally wouldn't (Nile Ethiopian)

10. Don't eat fast food (easier than I thought, missed playplaces)

8. Fix the screen on the porch

42. Get rid of one garbage bag of clutter (Good)

30. Sex every day (FAILED 3/7)

36. Take a vow of silence (7/15)

35. Throw a surprise party (Meg's bday)

33. Cook pork belly (3 days curing, 7 hours cooking)

24. Carry a water bottle (easy)

50. Read American Psycho and Frankenstein (done)

7. Eat all 10 Mayo Clinc super foods (done)

4. Eat gluten free (quit)

6. Get up early and walk around the block every morning (FAILED 0/7)

5. Eat vegetarian (FAILED 3/7)

51. Drink the most expensive vintage wine at Wine Room (Joseph Phelps “Insignia” 2009, $20/oz, was ok)

1. Do the dishes every day (fun)

52. Confess everything (confessed to friend, church wouldn't take me)

8. Fix the screen on the porch

2014 Resolutions

Cook the perfect hamburger

Brazilian/Argentian Restaurant

Chinese Restaurant

Hot Dog Restaurant

Sushi Restaurant

Korean Restaurant

Non-chain Pizza Restauarant

Thai Restauarant

Polish Restauarant

Meet a New Person

Play a New Game with People

Vote in Something

Create Z-Day Kit

Z-Day Drill

Listen to a record player

Sleep in car

Brew alcohol

Clean out back yard

Attend an Oktoberfest

Tequila on Cinco De Mayo

That XMas Brew!

Raise money for a charity

Get under 200 pounds

Eat oysters until stuffed

Eat ghost pepper

Get window plant

Do scavenger hunt

Burn an offering

Go Karts

Road Trip

Paintball

Talk to an expert in Latin

Paint ceiling

Paint bar

Level all wall hangings

Use infrared fryer

Service scuba tanks

Go to Enzian

Camp

Have a plant

Make a pinata

Draw funny faces on eggs

Go to Harry Potter World

Go to Epcot Food and Wine

Drink around the world at Epcot

Volunteer with Habitat for Humanity

A challenge to end a story with "...and then the world exploded!"

God said, “Boo.”

Naturally, it was very startling. First the world had to come to grips with the undeniable fact that there actually was a god. Then came the realization that he was something of a twat. Everyone heard that first “boo” and every bit of the taunting that came later. It didn't matter your location or elevation or language. Even the deaf heard Him. That was another thing. God was a him. The voice was masculine, but not very, like a preteen boy. This came as an embarrassment to people who had always imagined themselves to be edgy and progressive by referring to God with feminine pronouns. Whereas those progressive attention seekers just mumbled and switched pronouns, the atheists were overcome with fear. Well, most people were, but the atheists really went overboard with it. The churches were full every hour of the day. Crosses and rosary beads became popular everydayware, but so did other religious symbols like Stars of David or Muslim crescents. God never specified initially which religion was correct. He just said, “Boo” and let people panic. As previously stated, something of a twat move.

A few years went by which, if biblical scholarly types were to be believed, was not supposed to be that long for God. Some of the fear subsided, but really, no one could outrightly dismiss the terror and feeling of insignificance. Life never returned to anything resembling normal. There was no point to commerce or dating. Everyone was too scared for that. It was all “here, have it for free because I'm so good and should go to heaven” and “let's get married before we even kiss each other because we don't want to piss off the Almighty.”

When the earthquakes began, everyone blamed everyone else for upsetting the Lord Above. “He's punishing us because you touched yourself” or “This is because you had impure thoughts”. Lots of people died. They weren't normal earthquakes. They were earth (space) quakes. Quakes of the earth. The entire planet, every location had quakes at the same time, like God was batting the planet around like a kitten with trapped lizard. The destruction was awful and the accounts of the dead filled the airwaves. And the entire human race reacted out of fear and declared a War on God.

In the wake of the destruction, the human race united against a common enemy, though with no idea of how to fight their deity, a being of limitless power and omniscience. The Earth has united its armies and its greatest minds and had begun preparations to attack God as if he was some corporeal enemy, when an enthusiastic voice boomed from the heavens with joy in His voice.

“Ready?”

The armies scattered and the entire human race did its best to hide from the Almighty, taking to bunkers and staying indoors. In the coming years, children were raised to sleeping during the day and only go out at night for fear that God might see them. Stories were passed back and forth about God. Some were rehashing of religious tales and some were new creations based on the Lord since he made himself known. These were added to the existing tales of miracles and creation. For centuries, each culture had its own legends and superstitions of the creation of the planet and the universe. None of them, it turned out, were right. One day, God explained the creation of life, the universe, and everything. But not to the human race. It was very technical and contained many terms that human ears had never heard before. As God was not speaking to the human race, they only caught pieces of His explanation, but everyone was sure of how it started.

“For my science project, I made a model of the universe out of atoms.”

Through God's speech, which lasted for years in the time of the Earth, the suicide rate skyrocketed. When he explained the human race in terms of genetics and molecules, as if no essence of the human soul existed, society crumbled and neighbor turned on neighbor. There was no heaven or hell and God did not care for us. He wasn't even that good of a speaker. The universe must have been a disappointment, because he was upset with his grade on the project.

Centuries passed and society rebuilt itself as the certainty of God's existence and the existence of the universe turned to legend. Man and woman returned to normal over hundreds and hundreds of years. Children played, the world got along, and it was a golden age of science and literacy. God only spoke two more words to the universe. Scientists had started to panic about a gigantic dark mass between the constellations of Centaurus and Vela near the edge of the observable universe.

“Stupid project,” came His booming voice, filled with the bitterness and spite of a betrayed boy.

The entire universe recoiled in horror. Many died from fright alone and mothers held their children so tight they hurt them. The sound that filled the universe, that last sound in the universe, was a fuse burning, the distinctive “sssssss” of a firecracker. It lasted for years, but the terror never stopped. The entire universe was tortured by His final fit. It was a death sentence that could happen at anytime, any moment. For over twenty years, there was only fear.

… and then the Earth exploded!

300 word challenge: no adjectives

I saw. I saw it all. The children. The waves. The buildings and the businessmen. Details of the world I had never known to have existed laid out before my eyes. And I saw beyond the physical. I saw love. I could tell who was in love and who they were in love with. I could see the difference in the visions between the love of a father for his son and his mistress and his wife. They were colors, but not colors. There isn't a word for the difference in the visions.

And I saw hate. I saw concentrations of hate in one country that dwarfed others. I saw the depths of hate in that country, but when I looked away from it, I saw something else. Threads of hate rose up around the world as if the core of the Earth was a light source and someone had stuck pin pricks in the surface. This hate looked different. They were strings, extending out from the world, and not the pillar from the country. This was hate that could be overlooked because it belong to a person or a family and not a culture. I looked and saw people like anyone else. They didn't show their hate, but I could see it. Still, they walked through crowds and kept to themselves. It was their hate and they weren't sharing, but I could see.

“This one is yours,” said my creator. “Take care of this world.”

Diet and Exercise in my high school days

I'm doing P90X and as I was eating my mung bean and broccoli salad, I got wistful for my physical prime.  Then I started thinking about how bad I ate even though I looked cut.

Every school day, without fail, I would pop two s'mores pop tarts in the toaster, wrap them in a paper towel diaper, and eat them as I drove my 1982 F150 blue and tan pick up truck to school.  On a good day, I brought a cup of milk with me, but usually I just sucked my teeth clean.
2 S'mores Pop Tarts
400 calories
10g fat
72g carbs
6g protein

Every school day, without fail, I would rush to the cafeteria.  There were two cafeterias, one for seniors and one for everyone else.  I wasn't a senior, but the regular cafeteria had too long of a line so I would rush to the senior cafeteria and get in and get out quickly.  I had $2 of lunch money.  Chocolate milk was $0.25 and Zebra Cakes were $0.25.
4 Little Debbie Zebra Cakes
1340 calories
60g fat
194g carbs
8g protein

4 pints TG Lee 1% Chocolate Milk
640 calores
10g fat
112g carbs
32g protein

When I got done with wrestling practice, my mom would pick me up.  The workout so grueling I would just want to eat and just want to sleep.  She eventually started bring my bananas with her to pick me up, so I'd eat the four on the way home and collapse in bed until dinner.
4 bananas
420 calories
2g fat
108g carbs
5g protein

My mom is an outrageous cook, but Husband #2, while an excellent guy, like monotony and routine.  We probably had this meal 2-3 times every week.
Typical family dinner (porkchop, mashed potatos, green beans, diet coke)
620g calories
12g fat
40g carbs
60g protein

Total:
3420 calories
94g fat
526g carbs
111g protein

Exercise
2 hours wrestling training 5x week
2 mile run 1x week
Ankle weights worn and backpack weighted through school


The school weights are weird, I know.  No one knew that I did them, I think.  My brother watched a show called Dragonball Z.  The characters on there are fighters that train for episodes at a time and one thing they do is wear weighted clothes.  It sounded like a good idea to me.  My neck got huge from the bookbag and my calves got monsterous from the constant weights.

A quick scene that never took off for me

The character is Alicia Black, head of the Suicide Corps, a mercenary group that recruits suicidal people for their missions. She looks like an angel until she opens her mouth and speaks. Then it's clear she's as hard and cold and granite. She stands in a dark basement room of a mental hospital, addressing eight patients who have been dragged out of bed in the middle of the night by her armed guards, who stand to her side now.

Black

I never understood why people would want to kill themselves. If you want to die, then you obviously don't give a shit about anything or anyone. Because if there's anyone that loves you or you love, you don't give a shit about them because you're going to kill yourself. And you don't love anyone and nobody loves you, you're even more free. That's what the decision to take your own life is. It's freedom. It's freedom from life in death, of course, but there is a space in-between the moment when you have committed yourself to suicide and the moment when you have committed suicide that you are free and you are alive. It's the space of time in which you are safe and anything is possible because you are committed to something with a one hundred percent mortality rate, so everything else the world has to offer is safe by comparison. Leave your basement, leave your house, leave the fucking country. Go on an adventure, spend your time doing something awesome like tracking down terrorists. Go fuck a shark. Who cares? You are already committed to dying. Either you are amazing and then you die from suicide or you die being amazing. Either way, you achieve your goal of dying. I wish I was suicidal. I'd pull the barrel out of my mouth and point it in the air, start a revolution, and take over the world. Or just move to Barcelona, bang a bunch of dudes or chicks or whatever I feel like, who gives a shit? And then when I'm done, if I was still alive, I could still kill myself. Or maybe I'd do a bit more first. Because when you are suicidal...

Alicia Black leans in towards the mental patients

Black

...the world is your oyster.

Her pale face contorts into a grisly smile as she looks downwards and her hair cascades on her cheeks as she produces a gloved hand from her pocket, holding something in its palm, unseen.

Black

The world is your oyster. Because each of you are here for your suicidal tendencies. It is for these tendencies that the world has rejected you and it is for those same tendencies that I accept you. I cherish these qualities in the men and women who work for me. I don't want to stop you from killing yourselves. I just want you to do it for me. We do extremely dangerous work that requires our agents to be completely careless with their own safety. You'll do as I ask with no concern for your own life because you want to die. You feel that you need to die.

She opens her hand revealing five rings that match the ones her and her guards wear.

Black

You might as yourself why you would want to join us. I offer you the carrot and the stick. A reason to join me and a reason you shouldn't say no. The carrot is that I will find a way to make you happy about dying for me. We can see that your family is taken care of, a street is named after you, an enemy of yours dies, whatever I have to do to get you on board. I'll grant your wish to see you on my team. Say no and I will grant your current wish. I'll kill you.

At this the guards unsheaths their pistols.

Black

You're all suicidal, so I went ahead and killed you. In the legal sense. Your families have been notified that you succeeded in killing yourselves here at the hospital. Happens all the time. They have been given an urn with what they believe to be your ashes and they are moving on with their lives as we speak, no doubt happy to be rid of you. So there's nothing stopping me from killing you. You're already dead. Now maybe you can fucking count. Yes. There are only five rings because their only five spots available. But there are eight of you. If you don't get a ring, you die right here, in this windowless room, then we'll cremate your body and throw it in the trash. Here's how we decide who gets one.

She throws the rings up in the air. The other patients fight to the death for the rings, but two stayed back. One is a wisp of a teenage girl with scars on her arms who looks away from rings with shame. The other was man in his thirties who smiles at them wrestling with a sort of manic detachment to the situation. Alicia Black walks up to them.

Black

Doesn't my offer appeal to you two?

The patients fight to the death behind Black while she confronts the two. Finally, there are 5 victors and one dead man. The teenage girl and the detached man jumps as gunshots ring out again and again. Alicia Black registered the horror in their faces as the blood spread on the ground. When the shooting ceases, there were five corpses with rings and a corpse with a broken neck. The guards set to removing the rings from the bodies' fingers, returning them to the woman in black.

Black

You two have shown a complete disregard for your own lives

She holds out the bloody rings to the two.

Black

Welcome to the Suicide Corps.